One game a parent will never win is painting the other parent out in a negative light—to anyone. There’s nothing, nothing, nothing more detrimental to children than lack of mutual respect and a driving battle for control between parents, regardless of whether they’re together. False humility and the inability to value each other’s contributions hurts everyone, especially children.

There’s nothing to be gained and everything to be lost by clinging to the desperate notion that we are right, and only we can ever be right. I’ve been on the inside of that equation as both giver and receiver and rejected it fully. It’s even harder to watch from the outside.