Linger

Lost another dear friend to cancer. So many beloved friends and family fighting that fight, and I often contemplate the reality that I may soon join them. You never know when it’s the last conversation you’ll have with someone. You bump into them at the local mercantile—of all people, you bump into them. You catch…

Stupid Stuff

Don’t do stupid stuff. Own and apologize for the stupid stuff you’ve done. Don’t use the stupid stuff you’ve already done to justify doing more stupid stuff. Don’t use the stupid stuff that others have done to justify doing more stupid stuff. Don’t judge others by the stupid stuff they’ve done, because you’ve done equally…

Model for Life

I’ve tried out a few models for life in my 57 years. Some dictated by tradition, some by religion, some by the preferences and opinions of stronger personalities in my life who I looked up to or feared as the case may be. I’m still trying new things, but one model I’ve rejected is charting…

Must Begin

Love must begin with respect. Two people cannot move forward merely tolerating each other’s differences and looking down on each other as ignorant idiots who can’t see past the noses on your faces. No relationship can survive that. Neither can a country. There must be mutual respect for the genuine value that others bring to…

It’s Enough

Mother’s Day posts are often a litany of the expectations mothers try and fail to live up to every day. Most mothers I know don’t set out to be heroes—I know mine didn’t (but she was one anyway). Most of us simply set out to survive. Two of my babies are mothers now. They’re deep…

Watch

Love someone and watch them grow beautiful.

Too Much

To some, you’re too old to understand how things are. Too young to remember how things were. Too experienced to be innocent. Too innocent to have half a clue. Too educated to be in touch with reality. Too uneducated to comprehend the complexity. Too left to be right. Too right to care. Here’s to those…

From the Outside

One game a parent will never win is painting the other parent out in a negative light—to anyone. There’s nothing, nothing, nothing more detrimental to children than lack of mutual respect and a driving battle for control between parents, regardless of whether they’re together. False humility and the inability to value each other’s contributions hurts…

Near and Far

If you don’t love the people near to you, you don’t love the people far from you.

Anniversary

My husband and I are staring down our 30th anniversary. Things we’ve learned… Listen more than you speak. Give more than you take. Smile more than you frown. Manage thoughts and expectations (mostly your own). Recognize the value in each other and speak of it often to others. Acknowledge the probability that others are giving…

Still Never Fails

Love never fails. That eternal, profound realization hit me long ago when my kids were small and I was still struggling just to keep my patience. How incredibly all-consuming and eternal. It extends universes beyond human politics, philosophies and bottom lines. It has no geographical limits or borders. It has continued to hold me accountable…

Be One

Never begrudge the ups and downs, the goods and bads, the in-betweens. The best present in life is someone who stays. Those who don’t have one can be one. 💞 “Friendship is a sheltering tree.” ~Samuel Taylor Coleridge