Your emotionally immature parent Took things as they came Gave everything they had Hoped it would be enough. Your emotionally immature parent Saw the best in you Believed the best in you Tried to see the best in themselves. Looked. Hoped. Believed. Your emotionally immature parent Actually cared Tried to make life good for you…
Tag: children
In the End
We kept her alive maybe longer than we should have. The four of us. But those extra years were bonus years. Even when she didn’t know us…
The Problem With You
Be different. But not completely different. Just different in the way we think you should be different. Different in the way we think others think you should be different. Because we know. And they know. Better than you. Who you should be. Regardless of who you are.Regardless of how you feel.Regardless of what you know.Regardless…
Nothing More Devastating
I have come to firmly believe that there is nothing more devastating to individuals or society than “righteous” indignation.
Kind of the Same
Some flavors—like apple and banana and cilantro—pervade and overpower anything and everything they’re mixed with. Other flavors are more subtle but just as delicious. It’s kind of the same with people.
Fly Free
There’s a passage in the Bible about becoming as little children that I often ponder. It’s worth considering whether or not you’re a Christian. I don’t think for a moment that it’s a call to become like fifth graders or even two-year-olds in terms of self-seeking behavior. What I do believe it means is flying…
Must Begin
Love must begin with respect. Two people cannot move forward merely tolerating each other’s differences and looking down on each other as ignorant idiots who can’t see past the noses on your faces. No relationship can survive that. Neither can a country. There must be mutual respect for the genuine value that others bring to…
Can’t Know
We can’t know young people or assess their potential by looking at their grades or by sizing up their music or clothing or what they do on Friday nights. We can’t predict their futures by looking at their pasts. We can’t tell their motives by looking at their friends. We can’t pick out who will…
Well Behaved
It isn’t unusual for “well-behaved” toddlers to grow up arrogant, narcissistic, and convinced that the world revolves around them. They’re hard to teach. As adults, they fail to see their negative, self-centered tendencies because they behave so well. They make us look like good parents. Their deeper issues are overlooked or conveniently ignored, and they’re…
From the Outside
One game a parent will never win is painting the other parent out in a negative light—to anyone. There’s nothing, nothing, nothing more detrimental to children than lack of mutual respect and a driving battle for control between parents, regardless of whether they’re together. False humility and the inability to value each other’s contributions hurts…
Mothers
There’s a saying that I think is largely true for many of us—that you’re only ever as happy as your least happy child. I believe there’s another corollary—that children are only ever as happy as their mother or, as the case may be, the one who plays the maternal role in their lives. They can…
Fragmentary Life 